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Saturday, September 2, 2017

White Love

White Love
The "we can't air our tribal dirty laundry publicly" credo persists, even as sexual assaults and violent murders of "Black" women committed by their intimate "Black" male partners or exes have skyrocketed in recent decades, quite unchallenged by most folks of color themselves, but let's villify all "White" folks by speaking against "White supremacy!"

I believe that at the essence of the wherefore of some, not all, suicides is a total lack of self-acceptance and self-forgiveness in the very precise moment of committing the act of a total lack of self-compassion.

Some suicides, not all, are the sudden, no matter how in advance planned or premeditated, deeds of a total lack of self-compassion.

I love the way in which some folks will continually hurt you, then say most angrily, "I'm sorry!" And what about the "I am not perfect! Everyone makes mistakes!"
Well forgive me also this mistake: I am sorry for running away from you forever.
See, some of us don't stay closely to folks who have habitually hurt us, in hopes of opportunities or weaknesses to present themselves for sweet revenge, to fully inhabit victimhood, or to feel morally superior as a martyr.

Change is not one single event, but a long-term, conscious, and arduous toiling to essentially rewire the human brain.
Thus, the next time you entertain the idea that you could change someone to fit into your mold of an ideal partner... Stop, and have a good laugh at your silliness!
Or the next time you hear a dysfunctional folk or codependent say, "I will change...," run away as fast as you can to not have a heart attack; live another day to love your self or/and someone else, again!

I love my Self, and that is quite enough; at times when I find it hard to love my Self, I know, believe that I am still inherently enough, for Goddess's Grace perpetually redeems me at times of self-doubt.

Some suicides, not all, are attempted or accomplished, when pain or suffering exceeds the person's ability to accept and cope with life as is.

Wouldn't there be at least a public denouncement or outcry, if not violent protests, if a media corporation had called a TV series, "White Love?" We don't seem to recognize "implicit bias" at all, when it is being performed by our in-group or tribe! Constructs, like "Black pride" and "Black love" are insidiously divisive in most subtle ways, especially when used as a tactic to counter another falsity, 'White" supremacy. In the end or as a result, our own humanity gets more bruised by our own tribal hands, instead of her getting the emphathetic space and time to heal.

Beware of who you join minds and hearts with to gossip or talk disparagingly about others, for while you may be doing so for you are simply befuddled by others' actions or lack of, the person joining you may be doing so out of envy.

One never dies for or because of love; one can only live for or because of love. If you are ready and willing to die for something or anything, it never has anything to do with love, directly or indirectly.

Hate gives you the kinetic energy to transform into daily courage, to then move and stay physically and emotionally away from some leeches and narcissists, who you may have grown accustomed to being around, despite of their constantly abusing and disrespecting you as a sentient being.

Living with a mental illness is very like being born blessedly blind, and having self-centered folks, blessed themselves with eyesight, telling you how to navigate the world exactly as they do.

It's best to share your good fortunes with platonic friends, acquaintances, or the homeless persons on the streets, instead of folks involved with intimately, for when they leave you (through inevitable break-up; never essential who initiate it) to fill an emotional and physical vacuum, you may find it really hard to take cosmic responsibility and forgive yourself for not having more or just enough forbearance.

A "Black" transgender woman is recently fired as a spokesperson or public figure by "L'Oreal," the beauty products company, for saying publicly that "all 'White' people are racists."
The public outcry or violent protests that would have ensued, if a public figure, especially "White," had said that "all 'Black' folks are ... "

I write my subjective truth about my  past dysfunctional relationship with Helen of Brooklyn, as viewed and interpreted through the lenses of my own life experiences, emotional maturity or lack thereof, morality or lack thereof, discernment or lack thereof, ... In order words, my accounts are most personal, implicitly and explicitly biased, and only tell my side (50% only) of the whole (100% = 2 folks or sides) story, but nevertheless my truth (small "t"), thus my peace, to move forward with to a healing.

The vitality or exuberance of small children, with innocence still untouched, uncorrupted by the adult would, is like no other.

Following other people's advice on how to authenticaly be your Self, no matter how well-intentioned, is like having Cerberus lead out of Hades.  Good luck!

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