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Sunday, April 30, 2017

Collective Ego Expression

Collective Ego Expression
The worst kind of secret to keep is the one about yourself, and that's what internalized stigma or shame, and stereotype is.

When you have had as many therapy sessions as I have been blessed with, with some of the best therapists humankind has to offer, you, if not reflexively, realize when someone has not your best interests at heart and mind, but their own fear of suffering, scarcity, and death, upon reflection always, in order words, their own agenda with a linear order of human experiences, and subsequently their attempt at bamboozling you with following their ill advises blindly.

Two types of untruth-tellers: one who is most glib at talking and lying, and does so for it is thought of as a gift more than curse, and the other who is not so glib at speaking and lying, but does so in fearing the misperceived limits of truth in manipulating folks to the unlimited parameters of untruths, with imagination as guide to the most uncharted territory.

We always know more than we know, in an intimate relationship, but at times, we find ourselves in denial, in a vain attempt to amass social capital, or simply to submit to our sometimes insidious, primordial and hormonal drive for mating/connection.

You are always an accomplice to another lying to and mistreating you.

The worst partner you can have for an intimate relationship is one who doesn't know herself/himself, and is not even consciously attempting to know himself/herself. "Oh, this is how I am!" you will hear said often, while totally negating your observing and relating cogently to him/her that it is a deal-breaker.

Be most careful not to conflate supporting with helping the other involved in an intimate relationship with; supporting someone is being there to root for her/him at something that person is willing, ready, and able to do on his/her own, while to help someone is to be involved in pushing, doing part - - no matter the percentage, it's ultimately a sacrifice, instead of a commitment - - of the hard work for him needed to accomplish certain life goals, which is why it is so important to wait for the initial attachment hormones' pull, released inevitably in the human body, to have subsided a great deal, thus leaving one more rational to observe the other's life skills, goals and related drive.

Some recite the patriarchal, principally women-subjugating "till-death-do-us-part" marriage vows, and still not be committed to the relationship on any honest, empathetic, and vulnerable level. We do so in the name of tradition, social capital, and linear order or how the ego expresses itself collectively.

A narcissist stands a better chance of having an empathetic conversation with himself than with anyone else.

I could tell you a hundred and one reasons why I know, believe, and will act accordingly henceforth, that you don't have my best interests at heart and mind, but you would only attempt to countermand my forthrightness by mythologizing every single of my reasons to distance myself from your humongous ego.

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