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Sunday, March 2, 2014

Self-negation Through The Other

Self-negation Through The Other


Preface:  You are always your "best" Self at every stage of your journey; you are never not your best being, although you may be less-Human to more-Human on that Humanity spectrum, but never not.  As one spiritual leader points out, "You are never not on the right track," meaning you may have taken some detours, but always on the "right" track journeying toward your authentic Self.

One negates the other, in an intimate relationship, when one is unable to fully appreciate, accept, love the other, for he/she is unable to fulfill one's needs, wants, and validate one's reasons, conscious or unconscious, for being in a close relationship.

But I am afraid that the reasons/excuses for which one stays in an unhealthy, "close" relationship are as valid, and real as the symptoms of a full-blown panic attack:  for society, one does not want to be on one's own, out of fear that one's perceived need for external validation by/through the other would be negated; the reenactment of one's less-than-perfect relationship with one's parents would come to an abrupt end, thus, another loss; one has not mourned the loss of one's less-than-perfect relationship with one's parents; the super-inhuman attraction, want, or need to outdo one's parents on either end of the relationship's spectrum--either one wants to better or worse one's parents' score cards--depending on one's level of self-loathing, or self-love on that spectrum.

Here's hoping you look for and find balance.

With agape,
Mondo


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